42. How to Find Happiness and Make Better Money Decisions with Nicole Middendorf
What do you think it means to be good with money? Most would think it’s about accounting and math, but it’s so much more than that. It’s really about decisions and habits to help us achieve a better and happier life. Remember that money is just a tool. You can’t find happiness or satisfaction just by having a lot of it. Instead, money is a way to help you provide for yourself and your loved ones. It’s the vehicle that allows us to invest in experiences and opportunities.
So how can we utilize money to live our best lives? Do we even know what our best lives can or should look like?
In today’s episode, wealth advisor Nicole Middendorf shares how using a Live It List will help us find happiness and make better money decisions. She encourages people to live a life without regrets and find innovative, and sometimes even free, ways to experience life. She also shares the value of learning and growing after failure.
Build a better relationship with money so you can live the life you want. Tune in to the episode to learn more!
Three reasons why you should listen to the full episode:
Discover how you can build grit and determination to overcome any failure.
Understand how you can find happiness with a Live It List.
Learn how to have a better relationship with money, starting with learning about your money memories.
Resources
Want to learn more from Nicole? Get her books:
Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson
Listen your way to true financial happiness with Nicole’s podcast!
Prosperwell Financial Group: Website | Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn
Connect with Nicole: Website | YouTube | Facebook | Twitter | LinkedIn
Episode Highlights
[05:32] Nicole’s Background
Nicole shares that she wanted to be several different things growing up.
At the core, Nicole knew that she wanted to be a business owner that can help others.
She looks up to strong women like Madeleine Albright and Ruth Ginsburg. Both wanted to create an impact in the world and held strong opinions.
Nicole may not be working for the UN, but she is impacting the world in her own way.
[09:30] Turning Bad Experiences into Good Ones
Nicole wanted to go to law school. However, her now ex-husband made her become a financial advisor.
In sixth grade, Nicole had a traumatic experience with math. This experience informed how she felt about math moving forward.
Nicole used to believe that you have to be good at math to be good with money.
Nicole was in a controlling and abusive marriage. However, she was still able to learn and grow from it.
She believes that you’re living your best life if you take what you have and make it your own. You can either stay in a negative place or see this period as an opportunity for positive change.
[12:45] Misunderstandings Around Money
Money can be intimidating, but we can learn to understand how it can work for us.
Money is less about math and more about decisions and habits.
Earning money is not the challenge, it’s about how we can keep it.
You may meet bad and painful situations but remember to learn and grow from them.
You have control of whether to see things in a positive or negative light.
[17:37] How to Build Grit and Determination
Nicole shares that the years she spent figure skating taught her to stand back up every time she falls.
She is also consistently motivated to learn and be better. She reads books and listens to inspirational podcasts and speakers.
We will all fail at some point, but we need to learn how to get back up.
[19:35] Failure Should Lead to Change
You learn the most when you fail. Nicole shares that her ex-husband’s arrest was her wake-up call.
She realized that she could have a better life both for herself and her children.
Nicole shares that she could not fall apart, especially since she has a business and two children. She needed to change her life.
But change is not immediate; it takes time and work.
[23:39] How Sharing Your Stories Can Help Others
Nicole shares that she used to keep to herself, especially when she was still in her abusive relationship.
She realized how powerful it was to share her struggle when she did so during a presentation. She shared her story during a presentation and realized the power that comes from telling your story.
When you share your stories and struggles, it can help change lives and make a difference.
[27:16] Nicole on How to Find Happiness
Nicole shares that outward appearances of happiness may not be the truth.
She shares an experience with her abusive ex-husband in the full episode, retelling how he acts differently in public and private settings.
If you want to find happiness, you need to look within.
Nicole gave up many of her possessions during the divorce and had to start her business from scratch. But ultimately, this was how she was able to find happiness.
[31:42] Make the Most of Your Time with a Live It List
Money is just a tool for you to provide for yourself and your family. You can figure out how to handle your money, but you can’t get back the time lost.
Nicole created the Live It List when she was at her lowest.
Having something you want to do every month will keep you excited.
If you want to find happiness, invest in experiences. Nicole took this lesson and applied it to her List. Learn more about it in the full episode!
[40:31] The Live It List is More Than Just a Bucket List
You should set your intentions and write them down as goals.
Don't just wish for things to happen — talk about it.
Living your best life possible is about the experiences that make you happy.
Once you earn enough for your basic needs, more money and stuff doesn’t matter.
Nicole: “A lot of these experiences that you have in life, they don't actually have to cost money. It's when you give them to others, it generally comes back to you tenfold.”
[46:26] How to Have a Good Relationship with Money
Figure out where you are with your money and life. Find out what you’re happy with.
Once you identify things you’re unhappy with, change them.
Money and finances can be overwhelming, so start with one thing at a time.
Stop and become conscious of how you live your life and spend your money.
Nicole: “A lot of it is just stopping and having a pause, and being conscious with your own life, with your own experiences, with your money, and with what you want.”
[50:27] On Managing Your Money Memories
Reflect on your money memories to figure out how you view and value money.
For example, Nicole shares that her parents are used to paying in cash. Their values made it hard for them to understand some of Nicole's money choices.
You don’t need to adopt your parents’ money memories and values.
Build a financial plan that considers your values and what you need to change.
Nicole: “You can look at what these money memories are and what that did to you. Because that's what tells you what your values are about money.”
[54:16] Nicole’s Purpose and Achievements
Nicole wants to leave a legacy and impact by helping people find happiness.
She is also proud of being a business owner and a single mother to her two children.
About Nicole
Nicole Middendorf is a wealth advisor, RJFS, and CEO of Prosperwell Financial since 2003. She previously worked at Morgan Stanley for four years before deciding to run her own wealth management firm. As a wealth advisor, she has helped people create wealth inside out and empowered clients to create positive changes in their own lives.
Nicole shares financial advice and real-life perspectives on money through her books, podcasts, presenting at conferences, and appearances on several media platforms.
Nicole aims to inspire people and help them find happiness. She believes that people should live a life without regrets, and this is the guiding principle to her Live It List.
Interested in Nicole’s work? You can check Prosperwell Financial Group and her website.
You can also reach her on YouTube, Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.
Enjoyed this Episode?
If you did, be sure to subscribe and share it with your friends!
Post a review and share it! If you enjoyed tuning in, then leave us a review. You can also share this with your friends and family. This episode will inspire them to learn how to balance work and life.
Have any questions? You can connect with me on Facebook, Twitter, or Instagram.
Thank you for tuning in! For more updates, visit my website or join the community. You may also tune in on Apple Podcasts or YouTube.
